


Five Social Situations That Steve Tries To Keep Jeff From At All Costs

by Sab



Category: Coupling (UK)
Genre: (Uploaded by Punk), Gen, five things
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-09-01
Updated: 2006-09-01
Packaged: 2017-12-04 02:34:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 285
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/705531
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sab/pseuds/Sab
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Does what is says on the tin. (Uploaded by Punk, from iamsab.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Five Social Situations That Steve Tries To Keep Jeff From At All Costs

**Author's Note:**

  * For [fourteenlines](https://archiveofourown.org/users/fourteenlines/gifts).



1\. Meeting one of Patrick's new girls. If they meet Jeff on a first date, they have a tendency not to come back for a second one, and while that, on occasion, is the _idea_ , Patrick tends to like the opportunity to _actually have sex_ with said women before sending them packing, and if he can't, he finds ways to blame Steve. Jeff is allowed to come on second dates, of course. And _encouraged_ to come along if Patrick can't shake the biddy by date number three.

2\. The break room at Susan's office. Steve's been known to share a biccie and some coffee with Susan's coworkers; he and that bloke Gideon even took in a cricket match together. But apparently Jeff makes Steve's IQ drop a good fifty points, and Susan's forbade him from letting it happen anywhere her boss might see. If Jeff comes in, Steve's been known to hide behind the break room sofa, and one time he found five quid back there.

3\. Car-rental offices. Jeff always asks for the rocket pack addition, the inflatable carpool lady, and cup holders big enough to fit his shoes in. When they went to see the United they ended up walking nearly thirty miles.

4\. Sushi restaurants. Jeff tends to shout "cunnilingus!" at the Japanese chefs, and that makes Steve nervous, because they have very sharp knives.

5\. Airports, but that's less Steve's doing and more because of the restraining order from Virgin and a trolley dolly who's threatened to taser Jeff if she catches him in her terminal again, as last time he spent an hour lying on the luggage conveyor belt for a revolving view up the skirts of two hundred passengers.


End file.
